Fwah!!

Din know actually got ppl read my hlogs. So many ppl gan me for not updating my hlog, so i shall make a concerted effort to update lor. But recently i v busy, not that i wan2 boast abt my social life (which is actually rather non-existent), just that i got lots of shit going on that has totally sapped my energy. And given the kind of standard i wan2 set for my hlog, i will not write unless the entry is going to be steady bom pi pi hor. heh heh. The topic for tonight is:

The Suey-est Day

I tell u, though this happened quite long ago, during the 1st day of Can Challenge, the sheer suey-ness of the day never fails to send a shiver down my spine.

And it all began when i went to rent a van with Jooch for Proj Can (which, by the way, i have penned a theme song: "This is a project that doesn't end...it goes on and on my friend...some people, started doing wihtout knowing wat it was...and these people who started doing did it just because..." dun need to tell ya what the tune is hor)

Time: 0930 hrs

Rented van. Proceeded from Pandan Loop towards NUS, with jooch at the wheel. As the Vehicle Comdr, i hollanded and we had to make a huge U-turn back to nus. Not my fault, was an excellent directonist. Just that, erm, street directory was written wrongly.

Time: 0945 hrs

Jammed on road. Rained pouring. Inevitably, we had to slow down and look for an emptier lane to travel on. Jooch at the wheel, took a peek at the left lane to see whether can turn. Suddenly, we heard screeching!!! A motorbike had skidded right next to our van, with the motorcyclist on top of it!!!

Skidded for a few metres, then came to a stop in front of our van. Scared the shit out of me and jooch. Our 1st thought was however: " eh shit did he bang into our van huh?" hur hur. Can't blame us wat, rental van lei. Anyway we saw the motorcyclist fly off his bike and slide a bit more on the wet road. Fwah. But amazingly,
He picked himself up. Power lar. Hopped on his foot for a while then he quickly picked up his bike and drove off. IF jooch had tilted the wheel a couple inches to the right.....

Time: 1000 hrs

After going back to school and picking up log stuff, proceeded out of clubrm. Suddenly couldn't find keys to van. After much frantic searching of my pockets and the surrounding area, the keys mysteriously surfaced.......in the box of logistics stuff!!! *cue mysterious ghostly music*

Time: 1030 hrs

Me piloting the van. Proceeding on CTE towards Kovan to pick up stuff. Hit 80 kmh in the tunnel and happily careening down on the outermost right lane. Suddenly, saw someone high-beaming (that irritating thing ppl do by flickin their lights on and off) me frm my rearview mirror and horning me incessantly, and tailgating damn close to me. Me n jooch panicked like siao cos we thought that our rear door had opened, or my exhaust pipe was spewing out green smoke or something. I then shifted to the middle lane so as to allow the 'nice man' to go to my right and perhaps signal to me what was wrong.

Knee nah bei!!!

That cock drove past me and middle-fingered me all the way till he was out of sight.

Kow!!

Cannot drive 80 on the right lane meh? Got law say cannot drive 80 on right lane ah? Why he cannot cut frm the middle lane lei? He rushing to go pee issit? Wah lau next time i see his car i go buy SBS double decker bus then neh si drive 30 on right lane. See he dare horn me or not.

Time: 1100 hrs

Driving on (forgot where liao). Going v fast on expressway and waiting to make left turn to exit. Checked my side mirror, glanced once at my blind spot, and looked back in front. Then when i swerved into the lane for the exit........
BEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

this small car whoosed past the van damn fast lar, narrowly missing jooch by inches. Wah i tell u ah, i 2 second earlier change lane, then wan le.

And finally, on to the finale......after a whole hard day's work of collecting the food frm tamp, ang mo kio and bringing everything back to kovan, me xi qian and quek and jooch and chee kian decided to head down to bedok 85 for a well-deserved supper. Need to feed our well-developed, bulging muscles with food ma. Hur hur.

Finale:

After the sumptuous supper, we happily loaded up the same wretched van to head home, since quek was gonna drive us all back. Stupid cheekian was the 1st to get home cos he live so near 85 (bloody hell shld have made him walk home himself). After we dropped him off, the unthinkable happened along Bedok Reservoir Road

Quek: eh dudes do u all feel the van like quite weird ah?

Us: Got meh? just a bit jerkier lar....

Quek: No lei, my side damn jerky lei...knn dun tell me the tyre punctured??!!?

Yiwen: No lar!!! How can i be so f**king suey!!! There cannot possibly be so many suey things happening to me and this stupid van in one day lor!!!!

Quek: Eh think i better stop the van and check.

Van stops. Immediately, all and sundry hears a "whoooosh...."

Hong gan liao.

Got down from the van, inspected the front left wheel, and this:















Totally flattened knn tyre. How can i be so suey!!!! Worse thing is, all 4 of us din know how to change tyre. Yes 4 big macho guys who dunno how to change tyre. Called the rental company, and effectively, wat they said was, screw off and fix the tyre yourself. Our emotions at that point would be succintly shown by the above picture.

But an amazing thing then happeened. An uncle suddenly cycled out of nowhere, approached us, and shouted: "Huh?! Ni men bu hui huan lun tai ah?! Wah lao hui jia che bu hui huan..."
As we hung our heads in shame, he proceeded to roll up his sleeve, and got down take out our tyre!!



Fwah!!

Never would i have thought that someone would just stop in the middle of the road, in the middle of the night at 1230 am, to help 4 total strangers, albeit one who look as innocent and angelic as me.
















Above is the remnants of our wretched van after the nice uncle was done with it. And yes, we have finally mastered the art of removing a tyre. However!!!!! That was not all to our suey nite.

When we took out the spare tyre, the freaking tyre was gas-less!!! It was even flatter than my 6-pec stomach!! Therefore, to our consternation, the uncle told us that somehow we had to get the tyre to a petrol station to pump it with air, with the nearest one being 1 km away...he then suggested that we ROLL the tyre that long to the station. Being intelligent undergrads, we decided to call the company again. With intense fury brewing in my soul, i snatched the phone away frm xiqian and screamed at the person to drag his ass down to where we were and repair the bloody tyre. He told us tat we would have to wait for at least an hr, so naturally, we expected to wait at least 2. While waiting....



















Yes. We laid down on the road like Banglas, lying on cardboard boxes. Think all the motorists passing by muz have thought we were some stoned out teenagers (see i'm not that old hor) drunk or sthg.

Wats worse is, when the guy finally reached, changed our tyre to the spare one, and told us to drive on, within a few metres, we could feel the van sagging again!!!!

ARgh!!!!

Epilogue:

Got home at 330 am, after the guy sent us home as penance for renting us such a f**ked up van. The rest naturally got home even later. Yes ladies and Gents, behold the suey-est day of my life.